The last week of February at last…better days are coming!

better daysYes reader,

Mercury retrograde as well as February is ending this week. Hooray! I can’t believe I’m almost there.

Today, I bumped into both “Heart” and “Prince Player”. You see, I always bump into them at once. There’s never a day where I only see just one of them, it’s always both. It just makes everything worse.

I can totally be human with “Prince Player” if it’s a casual bump and not a whole meeting. We say “Hi”, he asks “How are you?”, I smile and say “Good!” even though I feel like hell- you get the idea. Sometimes he even gives me a compliment, like today he said “I love your backpack!” It made me giggle, as that is probably the closest thing to a compliment I have gotten from him in the past few months. And then, he usually says “I’ll text you!” That means, he’ll text me after a month. Anyways, the point is, it’s getting easier to communicate with him. But “Heart” is a totally different story. I stop breathing and my heart starts to race when I see him. If he says something to me, I am totally speechless and don’t respond. Well, screw him and his beautiful hazel eyes. I’ve been hearing about him a lot lately, and it sucks. I’ve heard he’s an actor and a writer. Why in the world didn’t we discuss either of these things in our relationship? I love those two things and wish we could have done something with those hobbies. That’s what always kills me about seeing him, thinking about “what could have been”.

Besides them.

Whatever I learned in Chemistry last week is way over my head and I have an exam on Friday. Help me.

I miss my mommy already.

I got in another argument with my dad, and he told me to go read this book called “Sh*t My Dad Says” by Justin Halpern. Amusingly enough, the dad in that book is exactly like my father and reading it has made my father and I become best friends. I totally miss him now and recommend all of you read that book!

And I’m working on the stress day by day 🙂 I truly believe…better days are coming ❤

xoxo. S.

Why This February Is A Little Shaky

I swear,

There is such a thing as Mercury retrograde as the people who believe in horoscopes are saying. Because the second the calendar turned to February, all hell broke loose.

This morning I woke up and I couldn’t move. Literally, I had a cold and cramps! WHAT. Why this week? My Chemistry midterm is Friday morning for goodness sake! And as usual, all my important meetings and lab reports are due this week giving me minimal time to study :/

And of course, I was missing “Heart”. So there I was laying in pain at 9 in the morning, 40 minutes before my first class. It took all the energy I had, but I eventually got up. And I looked in the mirror and almost fell. I was so pale and had bags under my eyes. What has gotten into me?

I teared up, but decided….The world isn’t going to stop for me, and I have to get going. I went to my classes, I couldn’t focus on a thing. I went to service, if not for the wonderful kids I wouldn’t have gone. Because today, the friends I go with were really mean. I told them I might not be able to make it to a meeting we have on Thursday night and they asked why. Not that it was any of there business but I said I have a very important Chem midterm on Friday morning. They basically laughed in my face and said I could totally go to the meeting and study after. Excuse me?

Do they not understand that:

a) I have severe ADHD and need complete concentration the day before any exam.

b) Only 6 people pass this Chemistry class. If I don’t devote all my time to studying for this exam, I will not be one of those 6.

c) Our meeting is on Love, Sex, and Interfaith. Out of all the 200 people who are going to show up to that meeting- I probably have the best experience in those topics and know all about it already. *Cough, cough my recent break up with Heart* and really just about every single one of the relationships I have ever had.

One of my friends who overheard the conversation sprang to my defense and told me that school is more important. And that I should just show my face and sneak out while no one’s watching lol. Oh, if only. I guess I will study with the minimal time I have this week and see how well I understand my Chem. If I feel confident and think I can do well on the exam, I’ll go to the meeting. But if not, I won’t. And I don’t care what anyone says.

In other news, I am so sad that I impulsively booked a ticket to fly to Denver this weekend. I don’t know if it was PMS or the Mercury retrograde that is going on, but shit’s gotten real in this month of February (that has barely even started) and I really want to see my family.

If you have any tips on how to survive February, I’d love to hear it.

xoxo. S.