That day I told “Heart” about “Prince Player”….Celebrating Our One Year By Myself

I remember being in our lust phase when “Heart” and I were flirting one day. And all of a sudden, “Prince Player’s” actual name came up. He was just talking about some random dude who has the same name as “Prince Player”.

“I don’t like that name….that’s the name of the guy who dumped me” I said.

“Aw. Why?” Heart asked.

“Because he was a player. Hooked up with one of my good friends too” I said.

“Oh I’m sorry Shahz” he said.

“It’s okay, I deserve better” I said.

“EXACTLY. One day, some girl will play him and he will understand” he said.

I laughed but I felt bad. “I don’t know…” I said.

“Look Shahz, you live and learn. One day you will meet a guy who will be so good to you” he said.

And then as we got closer, I told him that “Prince Player” said my butt was smaller than the other girl’s… “Heart” smirked- “What? I think it’s perfect!” he said as he grabbed it and winked.

It was on this exact day last year I caught his eye and he completely turned my world upside down. Out of these 5 weeks that he hasn’t come over, I was hoping he would today to celebrate. But obviously, he didn’t.

boysIt’s been a very tough week because of this. I have been so down and emotional. Today I made a joke to “Prince Player” saying how he shouldn’t slack because our baby camel needs child support (read My hope is in a little stuffed camel… thanks to him.) And this baby daddy says “he ain’t gettin any”. And instead of getting heated, I just said “Oh. I forgot you have other babies….” To which he responded “Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” I must have some serious PMS because I was not okay with him saying all that!!! What a douchebag thing to say. He just made it obnoxiously clear to me that he is with other girls. Which, why would I care anyway as I like “Heart”? Oh that’s right, because I haven’t seen “Heart” in over a month.

I hate how neither of them are there for me when I need them. For what it’s worth though, this year has been one of the best years of my life because “Heart” was a part of it. I miss him so much, I can’t stand it.

xoxo. S.

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