Yes reader, after a week of wallowing, I am ready to write again. Sorry, sorry, sorry- all of this Chemistry and missing people back home is just too much!
The week before summer vacation started, I told “Heart” that he is all I think about when I close my eyes. He wanted to know why as usual, I just could not for the life of me explain. And so I attempt to do so here.
Right before I met “Heart”, I was torn. I felt betrayed by “Prince Player” and all my other friends, and my family had moved to Denver. I was just learning how to deal with my ADHD- and it seemed like everyone just bailed when I needed them the most.
And then, I met him. “Heart” and I had so many conversations about what home really is. He insisted that I stay in Chicago and he surprised me by saying that he is actually going to be visiting my new hometown of Denver over winter break.
I didn’t believe him, the guy I was falling in love with was really coming to my totally isolated new hometown??? Sure enough- there he was working in my local mall! It was like a fairytale. Every single day throughout our six week break, we talked to each other about what we thought of Denver and Chicago. I started enjoying my new hometown because he took my mind off of missing Chicago. In between, he learned all the pretty and ugly about me. He went into a territory most lovers of mine don’t go to- the truth about my past lovers, my health, my culture…and he accepted all of it. As he left to go back to Chicago, we agreed that we would get together once I return as well.
And so, when I came back to Chicago- there he was, standing so beautifully outside my dorm. I felt like a princess- he reminded me of who I am. “Prince Player” and everyone’s actions made me turn into an ultra-sensitive drama queen. But “Heart” came into my life and reminded me of the sweet and strong woman I am and always have been. After everything I went through the year before, I needed something good to happen in my life- and he was it. His humbleness has changed me and inspired me. I look at his face, a reminder of Chicago and my first winter in Denver- and he is, a face to call home.