A week an a half ago, I was wrapping up my internship. A very stressful time of ending my job and submitting my project. I also got the news that I have been promoted from Executive Vice President to CO-PRESIDENT of my school’s club!! Wow, it just never stops for me. And I love it. I think. Anyways, that Friday night where I end this long week, I go to bed. I would have gone out but I was tired from all the work I did and had a photo shoot the next morning for my President picture 😉 So I passed out around 11.
Around 5 am I wake up. I feel uncomfortably sweaty. So I get up and turn up the AC.
I get in my bed when I hear an annoying vibrating sound. I look around and realize it’s my phone.
The first thought of all thoughts in my head is, “Why is my phone vibrating? Did I accidentally put my alarm on for work? Why would I do that? I know I don’t work on Saturdays”.
I grab my phone. I panic when I see the screen.
IT IS. “K”. His name appears in giant letters across my phone. The guy that emotionally abused me. And has had no contact with me for 6 MONTHS. Surely, this is a nightmare. But it’s not.
What the absolute hell??? I THOUGHT I HAD BLOCKED HIM!! Why is he calling me??? I put the phone on my coffee table and step away from it as if that will make it stop ringing. Or at least so I don’t accidentally touch my phone and answer the call. A minute later (or so it feels like), it stops.
My heart beats fast. I wait a few minutes. Now is when he should text saying it was a mistake, he didn’t mean to call me. But he doesn’t. I triple lock my doors. I usually only lock one of the locks, but that night I do all of them. He knows where I live, and he knows I live alone. I don’t know why he’s calling me, and this isn’t funny.
I block him and get back in bed. My heart is still beating fast but I have my photo shoot early in the morning and I need my sleep. I’m terrified. I say some prayers and fall alseep.
I had the worst nightmares. Terrible terrible nightmares. When I wake up, I tell Steven.
I had just told him about “K” when we talked about why I haven’t been in a relationship lately. He like “Prince Player” had been wondering why I hadn’t shared anything about my relationships lately as that is something I usually talk about.
“Must have been a prank call. Or accidental” he says.
“But why?? Who calls someone after 6 months??” I ask.
I decide to go to the gym. Usually I go at night, but that day, I don’t feel safe.
As I’m walking to the gym, I decide I can’t take it anymore. I don’t need to live like this. I want answers. I need to know I am safe.
I unblock “K” and text him.
“Why did you call me at 5 in the morning last night?” I text.
I keep an eye on my phone.
An hour later. I see three texts on my phone.
“Oh I think it was a pocketdial”
“But hi bee”
“How’s your summer?”
WHAT. THE. HELL????
- Pocket dial??? How do you “pocket dial” someone who is not in your “recents”?? And at 5 am??
- Hi bee???? How can he think it is okay to still call me this??
- HOW’S MY SUMMER?? Oh, I guess he forgot Winter and Spring too.
I go back to blocking him. All he had to say was, “Sorry. It was a pocket dial” (if it even was a “pocket dial!”) He has no business in my life anymore.
“He’s a player” my friend says.
“He was drunk. He probably didn’t remember” another friend said.
HELLO. WAKE UP PEOPLE. ARE YOU SERIOUS? I don’t care! I don’t care if he is a player or was drunk! Above both of these, he is an emotional abuser. And emotional abusers should not be contacting me!!
For the love of god, I only texted him to check that he was not out to hurt me. Not anything else. It bothered me that people still think I am the naive person I used to be.
So yes reader. This is why you haven’t seen me this past week. I have been trying to get over this, and defending myself (although I absolutely do not have to, I know I did the right thing).
He is blocked. I double checked he is blocked on just about every social media and anything on my phone. I guess I had only blocked him on social media before because I knew he would never call me or text me (and he didn’t!) until a week ago.
It is absolutely terrifying that right after I published that post about his abuse, right after telling “Prince Player”, Steven, and my other close friend about it- this happens. But everything is fine now.
Thank you Kaiya and Myka for being patient. I’ll have your letters out soon! 🙂